An Epic Beginning

I love to write. It is what I am pretty sure I want to do with the rest of my life (that is, if I could only do one thing). Yet every time I try to sit down and start to write on this ugly little thing I call a blog I find myself with nothing to say, nothing to write, and entirely uninterested in trying to think of anything. In the time that is has taken me to write just this small paragraph I have already twice looked at my news feed on facebook and turned my chair around to check the Yankee game. (Twice now)

Now, to some people, a grand opening to a blog wouldn't really matter. Particular in the case of my blog since this is actually close to the tenth posting. But as I stated in what I believe was my previous post, this would not be just some simple blog. This was to be a great story. A classic tale of life told through the eyes of myself that millions would be able to relate to, yet, never fully realize. (Which of course all would have been just a cog in the magic of the machine).

I just absent-mindedly checked my email and opened a link to ESPN, but I haven't looked at it yet.

As you can imagine, just any opening would not do. Weeks went by and I still had nothing to write for this wretched little monster, and the saddest part was: I really didn't care that much. It was a mild source of frustration and guilt but it stayed mainly in the back of my mind always losing out to short term pleasures and distractions.

I have had a lot of distractions over the past few weeks. A vacation trip with rarely seen friends. An ongoing apartment search. A sibling's wedding. The usual work frustration, with added pains of talk of promotion and raises.

But a time came early on today when I found myself short on excuses and oddly higher on motivation than normal. The vacation had come and gone. The wedding plans were all squared. The work frustration still existed but had subsided. And the most daunting of rain clouds over my life, my desperate search to find an apartment and find someone to take the one I was vacating seemed to be settled.

It was a funny little coincidence involving the departure of one of my current roommates coinciding with the reaching out of a former roommate prospect within 24 hours that left me feeling relaxed in a way I haven't felt in weeks. It finally felt like I had accomplished something and could just sit and take it easy.

And that is when I got the idea to write this first post of my blog.

Nothing epic, nothing grand. Just honest and anti-climactic.

I've always loved a good sarcastic anti-climax.

Of course, none of the ease of my morning would even last to dinner. My frustration with my work could soon be coming to a head. And of course complications involving my former roommate prospect has left me more or less where I started both in psyhical and mental state.

So it may be another few weeks before I really get into the juice that fuels my life. Something that I have long been wanting to shout from the mountain tops is my loathing for the Ignorant Liberal's champion: Bill Maher. But not yet.

No, for now, this will sustain me. I'll be content with this as my great entrance into the bloggosphere as I sit here in the dark of my soon-to-be former bedroom, picking dead skin off my sunburns, listening to nostalgic movie themes.


Clip O' the Post

Drag Me to Hell? No Thank you.

So in my last post I implored my ZERO readers out there to go out and check out Sam Raimi's new movie, "Drag Me To Hell".



Well, I just saw it.

I guess it is better than your average PG-13 horror flick and is worth renting or watching if you ever see it on HBO but that is about all I can recommend.

The opening was pretty strong but after the first act the rest of the movie is pretty blase more or less with the exception of a few strong moments.

The real bummer was the ending. Others have complained about it already all over the web. They say it is predictable and not how they wanted it to end. Well, I'm not really complaining about that exactly. I just thought it was boring and a little lazy.

**Spoiler Alert**
Now if you want to see this movie and don't want to know the end I suggest you stop reading here. But I was thinking about what would have made a better ending and I came up with this:

Christine actually does stuff the envelope with the button in it in Ganush's mouth. We assume that she is successful in passing off the curse. Then on the final scene on the train platform Clay pulls out his papers and Christine sees the envelope. She freaks out as she does in the film (saying things like , "no, it's not possible" etc.) and she falls on the train platform. Clay drops his papers and the envelope falls on the ground. Clay reaches for her but it is too late, Christine gets struck by the train and killed. Just as it ends, a gust of wind flips over the envelope and the coin falls out, revealing that it was in fact just a coin in the envelope and not the button.

I told this ending to my friends who also saw it and they liked it better as well.

I like it better because, for one, Ganush gets sent to hell and it is good to see the bitch go down. and two, it has a nice "twisted fate" to it. Christine escapes hell by the demon but is killed anyway because she is so haunted by the experience.

It reminds me of the ending of Vertigo. Great ending that movie has. I remember the first time I saw Vertigo I was told going in that the girl falls from the Bell Tower. And I was watching it and thinking, "well it is almost over, I guess it isn't going to....OH Shit!" And then the movie ends. Hitchcock, he got you right as you were at the door. Great stuff.

Salvation!

Back from the dead and does it feel good to be back. I've finally finished my "Subways" article and now I can get on with the rest of my creative life.

So much to say and so little time. I really feel like from this post forward my blog will take a new shape and get a sense of direction that it never had before. From now on I'm not simply going to ramble about nonsense, I am going to ramble about things important in my life that at least make some sense.

I'm not going to do it all here and now. I'm going to put it off just a little longer, as I want to do with most things in my life.

But there will be much to talk about. Bill Maher and other things that generally frustrate me to the point of passing out, my job and search for a new one, my apartment and transition to a new one, adventures out into society, sports, music, movies, and of course, the love of my life: Catalina.

Right now, what is really upsetting me is this magazine article's completion. It is done but now the editor wants to remove what is ultimately my favorite segment of the article! A great piece about the Masstransiscope of the Brooklyn underground. I think I can get him to at least accept an abbreviated acknowledgment of it.

More on this in the future. But until next time, enjoy this clip. And see "Drag Me to Hell!"

New Article

Link above and below. New Bleacher Report article. It's funny, trust me.

How to Be Cool

On A Mission From God

Ah Blues Brothers. One of the most important movies of my adolecense.

I'm only writing to tell all of my imaginary readers, and of course my one actual reader, but mostly my imaginary readers- I will not be making anymore posts until I have finished writing my next magazine article from Primer. I can't seem to finish it, its all a mess, and it is driving me crazy.

-Kevin H. MacLean

Circle-Circle, Dot-Dot

So apparently, I have cooties.

Or some form of bizarre sickness that keeps people from wanting to hang out with me. I had 3 count em' THREE extra Yankee tickets to tonight's game that I was willing to give away for free and yet I could not get anyone I asked to take them. I must of asked at least 16 people if they could they were...
Nathaniel - working/school
Leah - work too early the next morning
T. - working
Nikki - working
Mike - working
Kirsten - already doing something
Tommy - too much homework
Shane - never called me back
Vince - too tired (seriously!?)
Josh - working
Jr. - stuck at school
Brad - also, stuck at school
A girl named Lia who I haven't even spoken to in almost a year - dance class
Upstairs roommate - reason unknown
Upstairs roommate - working
Downstairs roommate - reason unknown

And I know I'm forgetting about someone! Well, anyway, the game was good but it was pretty cold so I spent almost half of it inside (which wasn't much warmer). I stayed to the end and on the way home I was freaking out between 125th and 59th street on the D train.

Just before the D train I was on passed 86th St. it passed the B train. I thought to myself seeing thing "oh good, I can switch to the B at 59th st. and take it home without having to wait long or walk as far." But then, things took a grim turn.

At around 72nd st. the D train slowed to a crawl, for probably about 90 seconds, but it felt like 98,586,209,012 seconds. As I hunched over nervously I saw the inevitable, the B train flew by. I thought, maybe now the train will speed up and the B will wait at 59th street for connection passengers. But the D train didn't speed up, it stopped completely.

I was now quietly screaming inside my head. I muttered to myself under my breath and I thought about how stupid the MTA is for allowing a local to pass an express just before a common station.

As the train pulled into 59th street, I was defeated. But then, a ray of hope. Actually more like an entire star; the B train was there waiting for me. And after a long string of bad luck in catching trains the last few days, I got one back.


Be Back Soon,

Kevin H. MacLean

P.S. I hate scalpers. They're dishonest.